COOL STATUS

• They Forgot To Put Hot Sauce Packets With My Order Even Though I Specifically Asked For Them.
• There's Not Enough Time In The Day...Yet, I'm On Facebook.
• My Car Doesn't Play Cds, Only Cassette Tapes.
• It's Humid Out And My Thumbs Are Sticking Across My Touch Screen.
• When Your Alarm Doesn't Go Off.
• When You Had Sex...But It Was Only A Dream.
• When I Torrent A Song, It Doesn't Come With The Artwork.
• My Life Is Just Freaking Awkward.
• We Have Too Much Food In Our Freezer So When We Open It Stuff Falls Out.
• I Retied One Of My Shoes Too Tight. Now I Have To Retie The Other One.
• Sometimes The Commercials On Tv Are Louder Than The Show, So I Have To Make It Softer And Then Louder Everytime.
• Whenever I See A Tap, I Immediately Stick My Hands Under Them, Even If They're Not Automatic.
• My Favorite Band Just Broke Up!!!
• Cutting Myself While Shaving.
• I Had To Walk Up The Escalator.
• Ahh, I Slept On My Neck. The Pain!
• My Laptop Feels Too Warm On My Knees When I Use It In Bed.
• I Have To Many Notifications.
• I Have Over 1000 Channels, And Yet...There's Nothing On Tv!
• The Volume On The Video I'm Watching Is Too Low And I Can't Turn It Up Anymore.
• My Mouse Used To Click Much Louder.
• I Don't Know How To Play The Guitar.
• Parking Lot Near My Destination Was Full. Now I Have To Park A Block Away And Walk.
• Why Do I Always Wake Up Tired And Fall Asleep Wide Awake.
• My Garage Door Opener Didn't Work When I Got Home, So I Had To Park My Car Outside. Where It Rains.
• Type In User Name. Notice Typo 1/10 Second After Hitting Enter.
• Downloads New Songs For Road Trip Play List. Forgets To Sync Ipod To Computer.
• Buying A New Dvd. Tons Of Unskippable Warnings And Previews.
• Record Your Voice Just For The Hell Of It. Think: "I Really Sound That Bad?"
• Buy New Sneakers. Don't Even Want To Wear Them Outside. They're In Perfect Condition.
• Grab A Tissue To Sneeze.Don't Have To Sneeze Anymore.
• Load The Toothbrush With Paste. Tilt Hand Slightly, Paste Plops Off Into Sink.
• One Pillow Isn't Enough. Two Pillows Is Just Too Much.
• Laptop Ran Out Of Battery.Had To Go Upstairs To Find The Charger.
• Bought To Many Groceries At The Supermarket. Have To Make Two Trips To Get Them All Inside.
• Filling Out A Job Application. I Have To Print.
• Going To Ride Bicycle To The Gym. It Started Raining So Now Have To Drive Car.
• Hotel Made Up For Delayed Check In With Chocolate Covered Strawberries. Have No Fridge. So Had To Eat Them.
• Alone In My Office. Hear Something From Other Room.
• Bought My First $.00 App. It Keeps Crashing
• Trying To Download An Ebook From My Library. Got The Audiobook Instead.
• When I Was A Child, Shaving Once Every Month Was To Cool. Now That I Need To Shave Every Morning It Isn't So Fun...
• Didn't Get On Facebook For Two Days. Miss An Invite To A Party.
• My Friend Fluncked
• All My Passwords Are On Autocomplete, So I Don't Know What They Are Anymore.
• 2 And A Half Minutes To Microwave My Food Is An Intolerable Amount Of Time When I'm Busy On The Internet.
• My Pizza Box Is Too Awkwardly-Shaped For My Trash Can.
• When I Take A Shower, The Shower Curtain Always Gets Blown Inward And Touches Me
• I'm Broke, I've Lived Through 3 Years Of Drought, And Nearly All Of My Livestock Have
• Died. Life Is Difficult In Farmville.